The Battle in My Mind

We all carry them,  expectations, rules, and assumptions . Some of them were handed to us in childhood, others shaped by culture, relationships, or personal experiences. They form invisible scripts that tell us how life  should  go, how others  should  treat us, and how we  should  behave. On one hand, these mental rules can give us structure and guidance. On the other, they can become rigid, harsh, and unrealistic, causing disappointment, frustration, and even shame when life doesn’t measure up. Think about it: “If they loved me, they would know what I need without me asking.” “I should always keep it together, no matter what.” “Good partners never argue.” “I can’t rest until everything is perfect.” These unspoken rules don’t just affect us—they shape how we view others, how we communicate, and how we show up in relationships. Why Expectations Become a Trap The problem isn’t that we have expectations; it’s that we often: Hold others to rules they don’...

I admire those of you who live without constantly turning inward, who move through life without the weight of reflection. For me, self-examination has always been part of my process. It isn’t weakness, it’s awareness. It helps me see where I need to grow, where I need to take accountability, and where I need to stand stronger. What I’m learning, though, is how to take responsibility without carrying unnecessary guilt or shame. Growth does not require self-punishment. In relationships, this becomes especially clear. When I stop caring as much, I feel safer. My emotions regulate. I don’t overreact, and sometimes I don’t respond at all. That distance protects me, but it also has a downside. The less I care, the more numb I become. I stop investing, stop leaning in. What feels like calm for me can easily become disconnection with others. And here’s the truth: if it isn’t safe for me to be fully myself in a relationship, then you won’t get all of me. Parts of me will remain dormant. That’s ...

Be the Love of Your Own Life We often grow up believing the greatest love story we’ll ever experience is with another person, someone who sees us, chooses us, saves us. But the most transformative, healing, and empowering love story you’ll ever live… is the one you write with  yourself . You Are Not Waiting to Be Loved — You Are Love Being the love of your own life means  choosing yourself  every day  in the silence, in the mess, in the rebuilding. It means: Encouraging yourself when no one else claps. Complimenting yourself when the mirror is quiet. Showing up for yourself without needing someone else to tell you you’re worth it. Don’t Wait — That’s Giving Away Your Power Waiting for someone to love you “enough” is handing over the keys to your self-worth. It creates a dangerous cycle: If they approve, I’m valuable. If they withdraw, I’m lacking. If they change, I crumble. When you  rely on others to meet all your needs , you unintentionally give them the power...

In a world that never stops talking filled with constant notifications, overlapping conversations, and the hum of daily chaos,  silence  is a rare and often misunderstood experience. It can feel like a sanctuary. Or it can echo like an empty room that reminds you of everything left unsaid. But what is silence, really? Silence is the absence of noise, but it is never truly empty. It’s the pause between heartbeats, the space between words, the stillness that invites us to look inward. It can offer peace or provoke pain. It can be a place of rest or a weapon of withdrawal. Silence, in its purest form, is neutral but its impact is entirely personal. The Healing Side of Silence There is a kind of silence that nourishes. The kind that wraps around you like a warm blanket after a long day. This silence doesn’t come to punish, it comes to help you  hear . Mental Clarity and Self-Reflection In the quiet, thoughts rise to the surface, unfiltered, unforced. There’s space to reflect,...

Every encounter in life can promote growth. This includes even those unfortunate circumstances. If you analyze  every capacity of your life you will understand the dimension to which each facet can contribute to your development . Sports have always been a huge factor in my life as I enjoy competition. The indescribable rush that occurs as you mentally prepare and focus  is absolutely necessary to give your best effort. Aha....I've already given two life lessons to learn from it...  Control your rush and  anxieties and you can focus more appropriately. Focusing plays such a major role in life because there are many distractions available to guide one off course. Being from the south, there are only a few common  sports that I did not seriously compete in during school. Those include soccer, golf, and swimming. However, volleyball, basketball, track, tennis, softball, cheerleading, and  powerlifting were all a part of my sporting resume'.  Although t...

Mirrors are glass coated objects that display reflections of what appears to be reality. In essence, these very speculums depict an outward appearance of what is in it's vicinity. This commodity is often utilized as decor or as a means to self assess, be it confidence boosters or areas in our appearance or life that need to be modified in order to be presentable. However, the slightest movement can take that which was a consummated image and bring about distortions. The cringing sounds of the mirror shattering renders a tenseness similar to that of fingernail scraping a chalk board or the uncomfortable sensations after realizing that reality has not aligned with your thoughts of "how life was supposed to be". This broken mirror is often associated with "bad luck" or a series of superstitions of some sort.  (Pause) You see, the mind is a very powerful tool and whatever that is planted will grow. (Play)  Nevertheless, I refuse to believe the negative associati...